Mailbag for 2003/03/24

After posting an ad on craigslist.org I received the following E-mail. It serves as a great example of the dual mindset which drives substance addiction. It just becomes a game of noting the contradictions of ideas which support complete abstinence and those which support continued intoxication.

Outgoing E-mail:

From:	ARID Site <thearidsite@juno.com>
To:	"Rob Rob"
Date:	Sun, 20 Mar 2005 14:42:55 -0500
Subject:	Re: recommended%20links
-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE----- Hash: SHA1 On Sat, 19 Mar 2005 23:16:10 -0800 "Rob Rob" writes: > Here is my experience in a nut shell- Hello Rob. Before I deconstruct your drunk/drugalogue here's a question which I'm sure that you'll be able to answer correctly: What is your plan concerning the future use of drugs/alcohol? > "Let us never fear needed change, once a need becomes clearly > apparent in an individual, a Group, or in A.A. as a whole, it has > long since been found out that we cannot stand still and look the > other way." > Bill Wilson summed it up quite eloquently, he knew back then just > as he knew about lunar flight that was to come, that A.A. was > going to go through a change, a needed change, in the decades to > come. There was no Vietnam war and no love, peace and drugs of the > sixties and seventies when A.A. came to be. The fact is that A.A. never changed. In fact it just became all the more dogmatic and resistant to change. It is still doing the same thing, over and over again, expecting different results but now making all the more money from it in the form of the addiction treatment industry using Buchmanites, cloaked within anonymity, as paid professional "counselors" deceptively using their positions for Twelfth Step work and deliberately withholding information on organizations outside of A.A. These "counselors" will never be held accountable by A.A. That's not the fault of the culture outside of Buchmanism. That IS Buchmanism deliberately deceiving others in the name of "rigorous honesty". > This is where we are at now. With the availability of other drugs, > there really is no pure alcoholic and the ones that are, they are > the minority. So these elder statesmen in the rooms of Alcoholics > Anonymous need to change their attitude about the still suffering > beings that come into the rooms. I now lovenly call these > old-timers bleeding deacons, these are the ones who feel their > opinion is the alpha and the omega of the fellowship, who play > judge, jury and > executioner and who dare they! These elders and their opinions > maybe a few, but they act as many! Actually there never was an "alcoholic", much less a "pure alcoholic" unless within the context of being an adherent to the doctrines which define being an "alcoholic" through its various beliefs a.k.a. "came to believe." There are people who drink heavily and there are those who did do stupid things while drunk. "Alcoholism," much less "alcoholic," is an ill-defined, antiquated, archaic and meaningless term short of a theological practice. It's a term which I found reflects one's own belief exactly as a Catholic believes in Catholicism. So I prefer speaking simple American English concerning such volitional problem behavior. To claim doctrinal "purity" based upon one's poison of choice is, of course, the same elitism being practiced today within the cult where the drunkalogues share that fervor of one-upmanship. I guess it's my fault that I never saw my authentic recovery from addiction as a competition instead of a life-changing improvement of one's own health and state of mind. As for the "elders" (I'm still giggling at the grandiose term, "elder statesman", since the obvious "state" these elders are from, and/or engaging in, is intoxication), or for an intentional pun, "high priests", are indeed the leaders of every group. Listen and watch carefully as when they speak the confused masses will hang upon their every word as though the desire to drink is some mysterious force which MUST be fed now. NO! It's simple: NEVER move your hand to your mouth and consume/swallow/inhale intoxicants! And who controls your own voluntary muscles within your limbs and face? If you really want to test their "fraternal charity" ask them one simple question: "What if A.A. is causing the problems?" Certainly the "high priests" will acknowledge that but, as I type this using that phrase "high priests", the term is so accurate. They will burst into flames each and every time in an explosion of anger. They do view themselves, much less A.A. as "holier than thou." Then they'll wish for you to go out and drink/drug when you see the reality and call them upon their Bill$hit. They're willing to let you die as they live through you vicariously, enjoying the smirking satisfaction which comes from such a "sacrifice." I've seen it happen many times over within "the rooms" and within the addiction treatment industry. And that's a quit drinking program? > It is through my experience that I know these gentlemen and ladies > are scaring away many more than need be. Bill once said "What > happened to the 600,000 that came to A.A. and left?" A good > percentage I feel came in contact with some of these people, a good > many more I am sure just didn’t want it. Or, from the mouth of Wilson himself: "You have no conception these days of how much failure we had. You had to cull over hundreds of these drunks to get a handful to take the bait." - --From William Griffith Wilson's Speech at the Memorial Service for Dr. Bob, Nov. 15, 1952 He knew that the program was a disastrous failure. A.A.'s own 1990 internal document, "Comments on A.A.'s Triennial Surveys", reveals that statement to be accurate as only FIVE PERCENT remain within A.A. by the end of the first year. FIFTY PERCENT drop out within NINETY days. The "Comments" document reviewed the past five Triennial surveys performed by A.A. up until 1990. All were consistent with these findings. "Hundreds ... to get a handful" vs. five out of a hundred. In other words, NOTHING has changed in 53 YEARS except the current scapegoat. According to you that would be the "high priests". According to me, Wilson and A.A. that's Bill$hit! And yes, as in my case, I wanted it: I wanted to learn how to quit drinking once and for all and not join some ersatz religious sect in the process. Thank goodness for AVRT(tm) which I found out about on my own as I "went it alone!" Now I'm a Ph.D. Too bad that not many people trust their own intuition and realize that there are better things Out There. The cult kills human intuition, or in Buchmanese, "self", DEAD! > The way it works for I is that I am an alcoholic, pillaholic, > potaholic, crystalmethaholic ad infinitum. I never went off on a > drunk a log nor a drug a log when I first got out of treatment, but > I was rather open about what I used, and it seemed I was at the > same meetings as these bleeding deacons, which they so readily > voiced > their opinions at group level, I stuck to my guns, and threw in an > additional verse in my daily prayers " God please grant the > bleeding deacons the serenity to accept the these they cannot > change" and it worked! Well a least they stopped thrusting upon me > their wrong > opinions. Insanity is when someone says Alcoholism and drug > addiction are two different diseases, now that is insanity! Bill$hit! You are a human being of intrinsic value. We've all made mistakes just like any other human being. We live, learn and move on. Why denigrate yourself with the labels? Kick them to the curb, stop playing the role of a "victim" and experience the inherent freedom of life itself! You were never diseased because there never was one. You enjoyed getting high! You contradicted yourself when you stated that you said that you don't do "drunk a log nor a drug a log". What I'm reading is one in an effort to convince me of your stature by what you have done to yourself and the poisons used. Indeed this is one large "drunk/drugalogue" on your part. I'm immune to such things. Anything, including the recovery group movement's "drunk/drugalogues" are nothing more than the utterances and appeals of the Bastard itself. The Bastard is easily recognized: Any thought, suggestion or feeling which suggests continued intoxication. Again, The Question: What is your plan concerning the future use of drugs/alcohol? > I then got obsessed with the history of A.A. and found out that I > was right, Alcoholics Anonymous is all inclusive never exclusive to > those that honestly seek. I was told that I was breaking the > traditions, I was told I don’t belong here, I was told what I can > say and cannot say, I told them to keep coming back, you should see > the reaction those 3 words have upon someone with a few 24 hours > under their belt. I can go on and on but the bottom line is that I > know what the foundation of Alcoholics Anonymous was set upon and I > read out of that book as well. So when I hear if it is not A.A. > conference approved it is not worth reading I say Bullshit! I know > read what inspired the first 164 pages and I practice step 1 in all > my affairs, I am powerless over just about everything except for > what I do here and now and most importantly I have learned to tame > my tongue, most of the time, I am an imperfect being, so I still > have my moments, but now I do have a design or an outline for > living. Listen to the contradiction: "all inclusive never exclusive to those that honestly seek." You mean that all of the rest who left, including me, are dishonest? Or were we not "alcoholic" enough? That's a very bigoted way of thinking and its just flat-out wrong. Besides, you are NOT powerless. Never were. Never will. For example: Who typed/clicked the URL of my website within your web browser? Who clicked upon the links? Who decided to E-mail me instead of clicking up the "Recover Now" button and following it through? Who is attempting to influence other people, places and things with their drunk/drugalogue? The answer is You, that's who! And, interestingly enough, ALL of these activities require empowerment of some sort. Your fingers have to strike the keys somehow, correct? Who controls the muscles within your fingers? You know the answer. > It is time for us to come out of the shadows, put a face on people > that have recovered. With the availability of other drugs out there > now, besides alcohol, more to the point, crystal meth, we need to > be more aggressive and let the youth and not so youthful know how > bad it gets and how good it can be! You have not recovered. Don't intoxicate yourself for 48 hours then follow this URL and follow the instructions within: https://thearidsite.tripod.com/RECOVER.HTM None of us need not "some out of the shadows", much less break anonymity and identify ourselves as "diseased." We just get back into life as the truly anonymous but with one tiny change: We never drink/drug. And why did we drink/drug? The same reason why everyone else intoxicates themselves: "To feel better." Likewise, to state only the harmful consequences and completely ignore the pleasure-enhancing qualities of these substances is withholding informed consent by lying through omission. That is a breach of ethical conduct which is, ironically, Traditional. > If I can do it any being can, to stay recovered I do need to do a > few simple things, still. I do feel you are wrong about A.A. as > well as A.A. does need to change its attitude and opinions. Also yet another contradiction in what you say: "you are wrong about A.A. as well as..." and another interesting phrase: "To stay recovered." It's as if I'm exchanging correspondence with two people: One who wants to quit once and for all by showing up at The ARID Site and another thing which wants to keep intoxicating itself forever and support A.A. Ambivalence is the essence of addiction: It's You versus the Bastard. I can see it. Can you? > KEEP THE TIGER SLEEPING! Screw that! Kill the Bastard EVEN in its sleep! But you're close in recognizing it. I'll give you credit for that though. Finally, the big question again: What is your plan concerning the future use of drugs/alcohol? You are probably hearing something right now: "He keeps asking that damn question! Why won't he stop it? This ARID Site is a whole load of bullshit!" Yes! Actually, I don't really give a damn whether you continue to intoxicate yourself or not. It's really none of my business what you do with your life because, after all, it is YOUR life to live and not MINE so therefore you are RESPONSIBLE for it. But think of this: Don't you think it's rather odd that you show up on an authentic anti-addiction web site and expect to be granted clemency for your addiction through your drunk/drugalogue? Remember that authentic recovery is an event and NOT a protracted process of procrastination. Do YOU give a damn about yourself? Recover NOW. https://thearidsite.tripod.com/RECOVER.HTM dr.bomb, Ph.D. AVRT \_________________________________ Editor of The ARID Site: http://thearidsite.tripod.com The Addiction Recovery Information Distribution Site PGP keys at https://thearidsite.tripod.com/ARIDPGPK.TXT ** The Twelve Steps are a downward spiral staircase ** -----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE----- Version: PGP Personal Privacy 6.5.8 iQA/AwUBQj3P4Lw9MOKEeRC8EQJ6dQCfS0Pv4yZDSe05Jm8EG5U/7gb7eU0AoLeD gU8l5+s4tbF++fw8dJaQf59p =hGHT -----END PGP SIGNATURE-----

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